Thursday, March 15, 2012

Beware of Squatters

Apparently, in my pregnancy-induced fog I never told you this story.  It's something that happened approximately one year ago.

My parents had come to town to help me put some order to what would be Scout's room and to help with a few projects around our house (light fixtures, leaky faucets, etc.)  After they had left, I looked down at our shed and asked Rykert if he or my dad had been down there.  "No," he said, "Why?"  I then point out to him that on the second story balcony of said shed there are some tools.


The blue shed, at the bottom of our yard, but just outside of our fence that is painted to look EXACTLY like our house.  That's an old picture by the way, but the best I could find.

A word about that shed.  It's really not the most practical of sheds.  It's a long ways from our house, the bottom doors don't close properly allowing a lock, and the area around it is a bit swampy.  There's a small ladder that climbs up to the second story that is clearly meant as a clubhouse.  The only contents of the shed are a few garden tools and odds and ends left by the previous owner.  The field behind our house is surrounded on all sides by private property, so the only way to get to the shed is through someone's yard.  Before this day, the most interesting thing about this shed was the time a couple of woodchucks took up residence underneath.


Anyway, back to the story.  Rykert goes down to investigate because I'm clearly too round to waddle down there.  I notice that he's talking to someone, and then the next thing I know he's crawling up to the second story for a chat.  I'm ready to call 9-1-1, and my mind has gone to all of the crazy gypsies who may be waiting up there.  A little while later he comes back up and tells me that a group of college-aged kids had "moved" in thinking that it was abandoned and didn't belong to anyone.  They were just looking for a place to hang out (i.e., drink and smoke).  He assures me that he's told them to leave.  

Fifteen minutes later they're still there.  Sick of hearing my ranting, he goes back down.  I can see from the house that there's some kind of negotiation going on.  At this point, I decide to take matters into my own hands, and I waddle down the hill.  They've now asked if they can pay rent.  Seriously.  I informed them that they had been dealing with the laid-back member of the household and now they get to deal with me.  I gave them a few minutes to vacate and included some lawyer-ly threat.

And that's when they hit me with, "But what about our couch?"

I scream, "You have a couch in there?"  Yes, apparently they have cleaned up, moved a couch in, and put down rugs. 

So as Rykert and I were inside busily preparing for our bundle of joy, a group of hooligans have begun squatting in our shed.  I honestly don't know how they got the couch in or how they got it out, but I'm pleased to say that we haven't had any squatters since.  Though I did see one of them at his mother's down the street.  Can you say, "Awkward?"  

4 comment(s). Tell me what you think!:

RadioactiveUnicorn said...

There is a baby trying to sleep on me. No fair making me laugh that hard! What the heck!

Jennifer said...

OMG - that is too bizarre! I love that "you have been dealing with the laid-back one..." You are too funny! I hope this situation is 100% resolved. Yikes!

janna said...

geez! They thought it was abandoned, even though it's in your backyard and looks just like your house? I hope they're smarter when they' re in class...

Emily said...

Don't forget the part of the story where I suggested that you put a picture of Chuck Norris on the door with a PRIVATE sign, and someone else suggested a picture of a crabby pregnant lady (no names mentioned, mom). Donald wanted to sneak over and put a "For Rent" sign on it, but decided against it due to your delicate condition.

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